It’s a tremendous character defect. I can’t get out of my head and start feeling obsessively about anything over which I don’t have total control.

The crush and I are just friends. Something might evolve. Something might not. It’s a complicated situation on a number of levels. And I want to know what’s going to happen NOW. NOW NOW NOW.

But it’s not mine to know. Our future is in God’s hands. Whether we stay friends or become more than that is not up to me.


So I’m worrying over nothing. Worrying, wondering, obsessing over NOTHING. Even if I got the answers I wanted, I would still find something else to worry, wonder and obsess over. I should just cut it out. I should really just stop.

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