Emotional Exhaustion

God did not bring me this far to let me down now. I have to keep reminding myself of that.

I got my husband’s responses to interrogatories today and it hurts to see on paper (again) that I’m a depressed alcoholic who will probably relapse and/or commit suicide. Does he really believe that? Maybe. Does it matter? No.

I work the program of Alcoholics Anonymous voraciously for a reason. I want to stay sober. Because if I’m not sober, I’m worthless.

I’ve got to just keep doing what I’m doing.

I had a great day with my girls, cooking dinner and drawing pictures for a friend in the hospital. I was able to visit my friend and sit with her for an hour and get her crackers or whatever. I was able to go to an awesome AA meeting where I was reminded that now that I’ve realized what a horrible person I used to be, I DON’T HAVE TO BE THAT PERSON ANYMORE.

And that’s pretty cool.

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